Ages: 24 - 64
Number of Players: 4 (in my house)
Objective: To get a full night's sleep
Gameplay:
- Each player starts off with 8 hours of sleep.
- Husband wants to mess around...lose 30 minutes.
- Read your book to unwind...lose 30-45 minutes.
- Curse yourself for staying up too late.
- Go to sleep.
- Achieve REM sleep.
- Dog barks for some inexplicable reason...lose 10 minutes and loss of REM sleep (oh, and your heart is racing as you wonder if you locked all the doors and if some madman is downstairs waiting to kill you entire family).
- Back to sleep.
- Enter REM sleep...ever so slightly.
- Son has ridiculous nightmare and won't settle down...lose 25 minutes and loss of REM sleep.
- Daughter stands up and asks for books...lose 5 minutes for thinking about how ridiculous that request is at 1:00 AM and another 5 minutes wondering how she's so cheery when you could literally break someone's neck.
- Back to sleep.
- Husband gets up to pee (even though he couldn't hear the monster across the hall having a horrific nightmare)...lose next cycle of REM sleep wondering how his ears function.
- Lie awake thinking about your to-do list.
- It gets so boring that you fall to sleep again.
- Enter REM sleep.
- Son has another horrific nightmare...you pretend not to hear it until Husband gets up to take care of child...after all, he owes you...earn REM sleep and ability to snuggle under covers.
- Back to sleep.
- Enter REM sleep.
- Light starts streaming in bedroom windows.
- Lose REM sleep.
- Alarm goes off.
- Son immediately starts screaming, "MOMMY!!! I have a full diaper!!!"
- Wonder if his diaper is filled with acid to make him scream that loud.
- Wonder if you alarm actually went off in his room. His timing is that perfect.
- Wish you could get more sleep.
- Listen to Husband bitch about the sun (you know...that huge star that gives us life and light? Yeah, he hates it) and our craptastic pillowtop mattress.
- You lose. Get out of bed and start your day.
Don't even attempt to piece together how much sleep you actually got...just suck it up and get out of bed. It will never be enough.
18 comments:
LOL, not sleeping well lately?
Milton Bradley has nothing on you!
I haven't thought this through very thoroughly, so I'm not exactly sure how it would play into the game...as a draw card, or a certain combination on the dice...but maybe there's a "sleeping pill" card or something???
Hahahaha!!!
Nope - no perfect sleep for the next 20 years or so! Then you will enter the old age stage where you CAN'T sleep! The good times just keep rollin'! Enjoy your sleep-deprived day, Happy One...
Sometimes I'm so tired that I don't know how I even remember my own name...(sigh). Hmm... maybe that's what I got so irritated yesterday over my nosy neighbors - go read about it - I'm sure it will make you feel WAY better about your own parenting. lol
Best father's day gift ever-sound proofing panels and black out shades for the bedroom! It's a win-win for both of you!!
Best father's day gift ever-sound proofing panels and black out shades for the bedroom! It's a win-win for both of you!!
Consider it training for when they're 16, driving, and you're waiting for them to arrive home safely.
And this is why I'm so done having kids. I need my sleep!
I so feel your pain!
I wish I could sleep like Hubby. The other morning he woke up and said "the baby slept thru the night, that's great". Ummmm....no, she was up about every 45 minutes. How did he miss that?
I like MandyE's suggestion...or maybe you should take a little shot of whiskey each time you lose REM sleep...though it might make the morning a little tougher! : )
I've played that game...I lose too. 30 minutes of fooling around though? That's not bad! :)
Lots of yummy love,
Alex aka Ma What's For Dinner
www.mawhats4dinner.com
I love how your Mom didn't sugar coat the truth..too funny! Thanks Mom!! :):)
Here let me try and do it. Rebecca it will get better.... in no time you will be getting at least 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep! Did it work?!?!
Have a great week!
what if you took benadryl (or drank a bottle of wine) before bed? would you stay asleep then?
i slept awfully last night, too. i wish i could blame it on the kids, but i can't. harry potter gave me nightmares. and i woke up at 4am having to go to the bathroom VERY bad! and i couldn't fall asleep again. boo.
I totally love this post...so creative the way you chose to write about it!
The lack of sleep is horrible...funny how no one tells you about that when you want to have kids. They're all like, "Your heart will be so full of love...you'll be amazed at how much you can love another human being".
But they don't tell you, "Your life is gonna suck big time. You won't get any sleep...you'll want to kill someone with your bare hands at least 25 times a day because you are so damn tired....and hungry".
This is a drinking game, right?
I hate the nights I have gotten up time and again while DH dreams away...and then I finally decide HE needs to get up for once so I nudge and toss and turn, hoping he wakes up...but then even when he DOES get up with them...I still lie awake and listen and figure I should have just gotten up anyways b/c now I'm wondering what's going on and if he's 'doing it right.'
first comment cracked me up! along with "Wonder if his diaper is filled with acid to make him scream that loud."
:D
mamanemery.blogspot.com
Wow, that game is no fun. Seriously I am seeing a little flash of what my future holds as far as sleep goes for me. I don't want to play that game. No!
This is not a game I want to play, throw this game away, I say!
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